Лучшие/Худшие... Есть мнение

Шоп чуток остудить градус диспуссии, фклиниваюся очередным шедевральным мнением оп самых выдающихся в поп-рок- музыках... пардон, Гениталиях.
Как там у покойного Лэма:

Прочь кретиноф и каналий,
Кто не любит гениталий.
Нынче стало очень модно
Славить орган детородный...

Итак...

A Salute to the Greatest Crotches in Rock History
For thousands of years, the crotches of rock singers have captivated the imagination of the world. An embodiment of the mystery, danger and freedom of the music itself, the crotch has occupied a central role in a stirring rock performance.
Of course, the crotch today remains a valuable weapon in the rock arsenal, as exemplified by the current wave of tight pants bands rehashing the Kinks/The Who sound of the 60s and 70s. More and more women are also mobilizing their crotches as well for the good of the rock. Take Peaches, for example. In recent years, the famed Electroclash chanteuse has turned her crotch into something of a cottage industry for photos, song lyrics and album covers.

Perhaps in time these performers will warrant special accolade. For this article, however, we cast our gaze on the elder statesmen and women of rock; those who burned bright, burned big and then (mostly) wilted away. These are the proven masters of denim pyrotechnics and their legend will remain etched in stone in the annals of rock history.

Whether by physical presentation, stylistic innovation or a certain ineffable spirituality, the crotches of the following performers will always live on in the hearts of the fans.

Robert Plant
The crotch of Robert Plant should be considered the fifth instrument of Zeppelin. For stripping away all ambiguity as to the proportions, dimensions and angles of his package, Robert Plant is a true innovator. On stage he may have been singing "Kashmir," All My Love," and "Ramble On," but implicitly he was whispering gingerly into your ear, "Here is the outline of my penis."

Freddy Mercury
Who can forget the image of Freddy prancing around the stage in his white leotard suit, jutting his ass out and holding the microphone stand over his thighs, toothy lips locked in that O formation. Picture him. He crouches while Brian May does a little guitar lick and then he explodes into a mighty full-body pelvic thrust. Head tilted back, he blasts out a high C, offering as accompaniment—to an entire stadium no less—one of the best crotches in the business. Are you ready Freddy? Definitely.

.

Iggy Pop
Iggy was a personification of the adage, it's not what you've got it's what you do with it. The man was a living crotch grab. His whole body was a crotch. Whether he was jerking it like a savage, thrusting it while flicking people off, or writhing around on the ground banging the microphone against it, Iggy's crotch was the centerpiece of the rock-pocolypse he unleashed on the world every time The Stooges played.

Bon Scott
Clearly of the Robert Plant school, Bon Scott, former lead vox for AC DC, was a proponent of the skin tight faded denims stretched bafflingly across the genitals like saran wrap. Bon was never one for subtlety though, and while Robert slunk around stage according to a somewhat trippy, faux arty aesthetic, Bon Scott strutted balls-out plain and simple—as if to say, "Yes indeed this is my cock—it's where the rock comes from."

(визуальные подробности в
Re: Лучшие/Худшие... Есть мнение
Автор: john lee hooker Дата: 28.10.07 02:50:03

Jim Morrison
James. Jimmy. Jimbo. Love the leather pants. No crotch retrospective would be complete without a special nod to the Lizard King, owner of one the most romantically alluring crotches in rock history. Where was the bass player in The Doors? They've got a keyboard player, a guitar player, a drummer, and of course a singer (a God), but no bassist. Why no bass? Answer: The bass was supplied by your own beating heart as you stared longingly into Jim's area.

Axl Rose
Remember Axl? When he was teetering over the edge during the Use You Illusion I and II album tours? He wore spandex biker shorts for like 5 years straight. What was he thinking? Nice rock crotch though.

Prince

Obviously.

David Bowie
In codpiece or out, The Bowie has managed to be all-crotch for something like seven decades. Master chameleon that he is, his offerings run the gamut from the subtle, GQ, perfectly-tailored crotch (his latest manifestation) to corporate 80s power crotch (remember those pleated white pants?) to spandex Glam super queen crotch (when Ziggy fell to earth). No one performer is so in tune with his crotch—and it's potential to capture the collective imagination of the globe—as is Bowie.

Courtney Love
As the only female member on the list, Courtney Love is a master of the "Fuck YOU, man" crotch. As in, "Underwear? Fuck YOU, man." Courtney's contribution to the crotch arts stems from her take on the leg-on-the-monitor rock pose: don't wear any underwear and don't do much tidying up beforehand.

David Lee Roth

Diamond Dave brought a certain athleticism to crotch showmanship that warrants special mention. Whether it was scissor kicks or back flips, the erstwhile front man of Van Halen and current coke-head wastoid Roth was the apogee of that golden age of the rock crotch: the spandex Metal years. Special mentions go to CC Deville of Poison, Bruce Dickenson of Iron Maiden and every single member of Ratt, but the crotch king of the '80s was David Lee Roth hands down. And apparently all the California girls say he didn't even need to stuff 'em.

-Morgan Short
http://www.smallswordsmagazine.com/articles/sound/rockcrotches.html

аффтар забыл некоторых персоналиеф...
добавлю отсебятину...

Todd Rundgren-на п не забыть....

фсё.
я кончил.

наверное, самая известная рок-н-роллллльная геНАталия - это обложка одного альбома группы как бы №2.

2realife:

>наверное, самая известная рок-н-роллллльная геНАталия
>- это обложка одного альбома группы как бы №2.

возможно, хотя были и более шокирующее выдающиеся обложечные опусы...
Ну, эт ф темке "самые ужасные обложки" и "эротич. обложки" красной линией...

Плавно, не удаляясь далеко от темки, переходим к следуюсчему мнению:

Самые-самые непредумышленно-"голубые" видеоклипы:

If you’re a “I wish I was young again” person like me and find yourself watching a lot of VH1 Classics, you may have noticed a few things about your favorite vids that were not so apparent when you first viewed them.

Back in the heyday of MTV some established rock acts made a genuine attempt to be innovative with their videos, trying to break the mold of chintzy special effects, testosterone-filled clichés and the perfunctory live performance. Striving to be completely different, some videos turned out, shall we say, just a bit gay. By “gay” of course, we mean every conceivable meaning of the word. Here are some gems (click song title to watch videos):

“Rock Me Tonite”
Billy Squier

This classic clip is hands down the most flamboyantly fabulous rock video ever made. And easily the most hysterical. In addition to stroking on stage with a bunch of guys, Billy liked to wind down alone in cozy pink and white sherbet-colored PJs from the Richard Simmons collection. Once comfortable and feeling the need to express himself, the naughty little rock star snaps and prances and writhes around his fancy, silk-strewn bedroom, tossing off pouty glances and come-hither looks to you… and only you… the lucky viewer. Rock him tonite (sic), won’t you?

“Hot Rockin’”
Judas Priest

Four fifths of the band didn’t realize this was going to be incredibly gay. One fifth most certainly did. This low-budget video opens with a pack of pasty, leather-and-skin-clad Brits lifting tiny weights in a cramped gym. No argument, this is the most homoerotic opening ten seconds ever filmed for a heavy metal video. What exactly is Rob Halford doing bobbing up and down? I don’t think the skinny chap has the strength to actually pull-off a push-up. Like every Priest video of the era, I loved it… and had no clue Rob was trying to tell us something, despite the not-so-subtle flames engulfing his feet and microphone in the final scene.

“Desert Moon”
Dennis DeYoung

This video should be called “Man Hugs.” The Styx’s frontman stars in this failed attempt at a macho, male bonding reunion. There’s just way too many guys embracing, high-fiving, leering and tackling (shirts-vs-skins football game) to be believable. To be fair, Henry Rollins, Danzig and the guys from GWAR couldn’t make this production look hetero. A brief moment showing Mr. Roboto pining away for a lost love (a woman) is not the least bit convincing. He’s back to the merry manly hijinx and back-slapping in no time.

“Dancing In The Dark”
Bruce Springsteen

After years of being a scrawny and smelly Jersey dirtbag, Bruce was extremely excited to show off his freshly-shaved mug and newly toned biceps. When chirping out a lightweight piece of pop fluff like this, The Boss knew a crisp white blouse with rolled-up sleeves, neatly tucked high into his tight, tight jeans would be the perfect outfit to sway back and forth uncomfortably and attract a whole new audience. Adding to the overall gay motif, the gal he brings up on stage (yes, I know it’s the Friends chick) has a boy’s haircut, boy’s clothes and resembles an even cuter Jake Gyllenhaal. And please don’t overlook clap-happy Clarence looking like a bouncer at a tranny bar.

“Dancing in the Street”
Mick Jagger and David Bowie

Two rock legends have never — ever — come closer to a full-on make-out session on film than these two sprightly, dancing fools belting out a truly atrocious song. This silly, over-saturated video from 1985 gave fuel to the fire that the Rolling Stone front man and The Thin White Duke were bunk mates back in the day.

“Say Say Say”
Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney

I know, this is too easy. Anything with Jacko in it should rule out the word “unintentional,” but when Mac and Jack shave and apply make-up together, well, we just can’t leave this tender moment alone. Love seemed to be in the air between these pop stars and Linda could do nothing but helplessly watch the romance blossom (and look unsexy strumming a guitar). This otherwise charming and innocent video does contain some serious creepiness; I’m pretty sure the girl Jacko ogles unconvincingly throughout the video is actually his putty-faced sister La Toya. Ick!

“Lick It Up Video”
Kiss

When you get past the costumes, the bravado and the fire-spewing theatrics, and just listen to the music, I mean really listen to the music; you’ll realize one thing… “Man, Kiss sucked!” That’s beside the point. I think this was one of the first videos these jokers did without their theater makeup, (who knows, who cares), but the amount of Mary Kay cosmetics they cake on in its place is visually stunning. Check out the generously applied blush on Paul Stanley’s cheek. Cease typing your angry emails Kiss Army members, we know the boys and especially Gene are 100% lady-loving sex machines, he’s made a career of telling all about his conquests. What a dork. This video is more of a fashion show catwalk, with the boys ignoring the fawning girls and proudly stating, “Look at our outfits, behold our pretty scarves!” You know when kids say, “Man that is so gay!” That’s exactly the kind of gay we’re talkin’ about here.

“Kokomo”
Beach Boys


“Hey Beach Boys, wanna do a song for a movie starring that macho hunk Tom Cruise?”

“You Bet!”

“Great, you’ll love it! It’s about bars and drinking and chicks…”

“Tubular! We’re so stoked!”

Fast forward two months… Mike Love tucking his unbuttoned shirt into his high-pocket slacks, John Stamos wearing a pink tank top gentle tapping some silly bongos and the ambiguously gay Tom Cruise preparing mass quantities of girly drinks made darn sure this classic video is forever filed under “Super Gay!” And no, the bikini-clad chicks running and bouncing down the beach does not make it any less gay.

“Good Vibrations”

Marky Mark

We get it Marky, you work out… a lot… with home-made weights. (What, you couldn’t find a Bowflex in Boston?) Many male artists have gone shirtless in videos and that’s cool, because most of them are pale, flabby messes (Ozzy) or drugged-out, heroin skinny flyweights (that jailbird from STP) and it’s a hoot to watch. But when you go shirtless and you are built like a brick shithouse, well that’s just gay (read: very intimidating to hetero guys). Let’s recap: Musicians who work out and flaunt it: very gay. Musicians who abuse their bodies and flaunt it: very guy.

http://www.usedwigs.com/unintentionally-gay-music-videos/

2john lee hooker:

>Самые-самые непредумышленно-"голубые" видеоклипы:

хороший критерий! главное, что непредумышленно. типа, "так получилось"... :)))
ну, по крайнее мерее что-то новое в наших "рейтингах" появилось.
можно сюда отнести и вклад отечественных работников культуры в виде клипа и песни "Голубая луна" Трубача/Моисеева, а так же любое появление на сцене Киркорова и Леонтьева в их, если можно так назвать, неординарных костюмах :)